Everything in my life is breaking. Slowly its becoming more noticeable. I go through phases, of growth and deterioration. The peak of every mountain is the bottom of another, and so it goes. I could go on to detail every last thing that unexpectedly has broken on me, but last night was the finale. With a shattered phone screen I decided to stop feeling helpless and instead do a little investigation into the meaning of everything breaking unexpectedly. That’s when I stumbled upon this:
That person who wrote that beautiful comforting message was not me. When I reached the end of the post signed Dominique, my jaw dropped and tears welled up in my eyes. Someone with my name had written those words, and out of the millions of google search results, I landed on that one. Moments after I let my knees hit the ground, touching my forehead to the floor, arms outreached in front of me and basked in the moment of cosmic ridiculousness.
Tonight I am heading to see The Goo Goo Dolls. When the lyrics to Iris meet my ears its going to be a full surrender. “When everything’s meant to be broken. I just want you to know who I am.” Music to me has such an incredibly strong physical reaction on my body, from goosebumps, to tears, to heart wrenching pain. I am ready to surrender to all the brokenness and my life and move forward. Tonight is the night where I begin again.